Rush of my Heart

Where to begin?
How about at the beginning.
It started with a double dose of music in one day. I decided I needed a little inspiration to get my butt in gear as far as new songs go, so when I heard Jason Castro was in my area, I went to both of his shows.
Turns out, it was just what I needed.
After hearing him play two sets, meeting him afterwards, giving him one of my cd’s and hearing about his work, I went home and cranked out a song in a couple hours, and dreamt in music all night long.
Musical epiphanies weren’t the only ones I had that day – for one, I found that the journey to Modesto was a much longer drive than I thought it would be. And second – I love my dad. I guess “epiphany” is the wrong word here, since this is something I already knew. But I love it when something just reminds me to stop and think about how much I not only love, but genuinely like the people in my family. We had amazing conversations all the long drive home through the lingeringly warm Tracy hills as we drank soda and watched the windmills in the darkness.
The following day, the musical juices were still flowing, and all day long I was filling my small songbook with scribbled lyrics and ideas for new material. But somehow, when I arrived at home, I spent three unproductive hours sitting cross legged in my room with my guitar in my lap, with next to nothing to show for it.
I finally called it a night after 1 am, and stared at the leaves hanging from my ceiling as I tried to fall asleep. But the music wouldn’t let me go — I felt that I had to get it out – I felt suffocated, heavy, pregnant with song. And in my frustration, something new was born: A song about not being able to write a song. Once the idea came, there was no stopping it, and now it is almost complete.
The following day I gave a 40 minute presentation to the tech committee on, as listed in the agenda: “student outreach using free web-based technology”…fun, right? In addition to my uncomfortable shoes, during my presentation I noticed someone in the back sleeping, with a small puddle of drool on his shoulder and a twitching leg. I felt a sudden surge of envy in my sleep deprived state, and absurdly wondered if I could somehow find a way to pitch a mandatory “nap time” to the committee. Giggling out loud, I had to stop for a moment to collect my thoughts, as the others on the committee wondered what was so funny about a growing demographic of users ages 35 and up. Nothing.
My mother decided to make an appearance on the west coast last night – after her 2 week stay in Georgia with her mother. As we were waiting for her plane to land at the airport, I wandered a bit around the baggage claim. I love airports, is that weird? I love how they look. How they sound. Even how they smell. I love watching the people hurry through the halls with heavy backpacks, dragging luggage behind them. I love watching reunions, and people in suits standing with signs waiting to meet a stranger. I love seeing the screens flash all the destinations. To me, it always seems like suddenly my possibilities are endless, and all I would have to do is throw down my credit card, and in just a few hours I could be practically anywhere in the world. The second I enter an airport I’m always struck by an intense longing to see the world and to have an adventure all my own, instead of just watching the exotic looking people come and go all around me. One day, I’ll be the one hopping on a plane. But I’ll buy an extra seat for my guitar.
Psh. My hair’s a mess, my fingers have guitar string stain, and my stomach is growling. I came home this afternoon to blazing heat in my un-airconditioned house, but was only able to manage a bowl of hot oatmeal in my sore mouth.
I saw a dentist yesterday, and wasn’t surprised to hear that all of my wisdom teeth need to come out in the next few weeks since there’s no more room for them. Apparently, one side is so painful because the gigantor tooth is growing up against a nerve. Awesome. I want them out! But 3 shows in the next 3 weeks make that a bit difficult – though I know this case takes precedence.
Oh…teeth. How I love and hate what you do for me.
If I can avoid missing shows though, I will.
Tomorrow night is my first San Francisco show. I think it’s about time I start breaking into that scene. It’s funny, I’m not much of a city lover, so I usually stay away when I can. That’s not the most strategic move as a musician, I realize this. So when I was asked to play at a cafe for an Acoustic Music Series, I agreed – and now I’m looking forward to it. If only I could take a plane there. Then it would be a REAL adventure..
Speaking of music, if any music lovers are reading this, take a minute to check out http://www.BandsOfTheBay.com. This is an awesome site that supports independent artists; it’s great if you’re a musician looking to get your stuff out there and network with other musicians. I created a profile here, and I’m now featured on the homepage and have an album review up on this same site. Again I say, if you’re a musician or just wanting to hear some music and read interviews and blogs, check this place out, it’s awesome.
This brings us to now. I am sitting on my couch watching the second Ghostbusters movie on AMC. A woman’s fur coat just got touched by Pepto-Bismol running in the streets, sprouted muppets, and attacked her. Oh..1989. You were awesome.
The weekend is officially here.