You know the expression, “There’s nothing new under the sun”? I sat in church this morning, wondering if this could possibly be true. On one hand, I believe it to be absolute truth. There’s been too much time, too many people – of course someone on the planet has experienced the same feelings/thoughts/situations as me. But then again – I find that thought to be a rather depressing one, since I like to maintain a somewhat firm grasp on the idea that I can be an individual if I choose, which I do. But then again – I’m sure THAT thought isn’t original either. Or is it?
Hmm. I just decided. I won’t dwell on it.
This past week has been one more full of adventure than any I’ve had in a long while.
It began with a breakdown.
Relax, it wasn’t vehicular, but emotional.
I had a few BL days (what I’ve come to know as “Bad Leg” days) that put me in a particularly snarly mood. I snapped at someone I love very much, more than once. What’s worse, in my pain and irrational overall irritation, I tried to justify whatever it was I was snapping about..which just didn’t even begin to work. It ended with me in frustrated tears, sitting inside and alone on a perfectly beautiful day, as a piece of my heart walked out the front door.
After some serious pep-talks from the girls in my life who know me well, it was decided that I needed to get out. And so I did.
I went with one of my closest girl friends to her house, which just so happens to be 3 hours away in the heart of the Tuolomne forest – so far from town that airplanes startle you on the rare occasion when they fly past in the sky.
We took the quad out for a spin, and laid in the grass in our layers of clothing, switching off between writing in journals, reading our bibles, and passing a thermos of hot coffee back and forth. I watched the subtle clouds coming off of the black liquid and felt my own dark thoughts tangle and drift off with the fleeing steam, leaving me feeling suddenly peaceful. As soon as the sun dipped behind the tree line, the temperature plummeted, and by the time our quad reached her property, I had no feeling in my face anymore.
We drove to town to attend a loosely structured “church service” that met in an empty barn called The Shop. I counted 15 articles of clothing on my body, and still I shivered in the darkness as the music started.
It ended three hours later with a group of strangers standing beside me, praying for a leg that just won’t heal. Goosebumps rose on my covered flesh when a woman I’d never met knelt beside me after hearing I was having some health trouble and touched the correct knee without me telling her, asking God aloud to heal the nerves that were causing me so much pain.
If you’ve never experienced it, having perfect strangers come to your aide when you’re in some kind of distress is an oddly emotional experience. There may be nothing new under this sun, but have you ever personally experienced this? When they’re taking their own time to talk to God on your behalf, it’s even more amazing. I left feeling like a burden had been divided in my spirit, and suddenly the load seemed easier to carry. I stayed quiet for the long ride home.
We slept in her trailer, and I when the temperature dropped to the low 30’s, I got down on my hands and knees and found that I have rather a knack for wood stoves.
We weren’t even there 24 hours before we made the same trek down the dirt road, through the tiny town, into the city, and finally to the highway. Here, we found a roadblock. The two lane highway was backed up for more than an hour, while a single truck escorted traffic first one direction, then the other, causing a backup that snaked through the base of the volcanic mountaintops. We turned the bluegrass on and rolled down the windows, watching the thermometer flip-flop between 48 and 84 degrees as we sipped our Starbucks coffee and watched the mustached man in the orange jump suit talk on his walkie-talkie.
By the time the old white jeep finally rolled to a stop in front of my family’s bay area residence, my throat was hoarse from all the thoughts I’d voiced during the the long stretch of opportunity we’d just had.
I showered the forest off of me, said goodbye and switched to my car, then drove another 3 and a half hours to get to San Luis Obispo. When full dark fell, the everlasting unlit valley road seemed to stretch on forever, void of any other cars. I cranked up the music and willed myself awake.
I got the jolt of a happy puppy when another car appeared on the road behind me, and the general happiness of just seeing someone else in the emptiness continued as the car approached me fast from behind. I had a fleeting thought that whoever it was, they were speeding. That thought vanished when multi-colored lights started flashing on the roof of his car. My guts hit the floorboards as I glanced at my speedometer. I made my way to the side of the road. And so my friends, this is how I got my very first speeding ticket.
Then I got lost.
There was much pouting in the process.
You know what bugs me? When construction workers close important freeway off-ramps, and don’t provide a detour. Or street lights. I’m sure this same thought has been thought by many a moonlit wanderer, eager to get to their destination.
When I finally arrived at almost 10pm, I was ready to stay put for a while, and so I did.
When I came home several days later, it was with an unexpected passenger. She just so happened to be four legged.
Yes friends, I came across a Siberian Husky in a Pismo Beach pet shop one afternoon, and since this has been my brother’s dream dog for a while, I couldn’t resist taking her home with visions of upcoming adventures in Washington between a boy and his dog. I drugged her, and she slept like a baby almost all the way home – which took me considerably longer than the trip there had. My eyes were glued to my review mirror and narrowed into slits of frustration; hating every minute of my light footedness. That’s when I realized…I should have been a cop. I wondered how many others out there had had the same epiphany due to a certain inclination to ..well ..go faster.
I’ve been home now for several days, and the steady rhythm of life is slowly picking up the beat again.
A storm is coming. I can hear the windchimes outside voicing their concern. But I know it will be alright, and I told them this. After all – it’s nothing new, whether or not the sun decides to show his face.
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